Images + Captions

I took the A train today

2012-02-22T11:28:00.000-08:00

I took the A train today, and if you work, you know the A train going downtown is always packed. I once was lucky to walk in and find a seat by the door. The thing with the subway in New York is that it's unpredictable. I saw the C train running on the B/D track. The A train became local all of a sudden and would only stop at certain stops. The L stopped working and I think it was because of the guy who committed suicide and splatted his guts everywhere.

I love it when I walk down the stairs and both trains come at the same time. It's one of the most beautiful things, I think. You stand there in the middle as these two trains rush by and it causes your hair to fly everywhere. I make sure to pause and enjoy that moment. When I got in the train, I barely took two steps. I found the nearest pole and held on. I never really know what to do when I'm standing. Usually I sit, look around really quickly to see how crowded the train is, then I close my eyes. You would think that I should open them and enjoy what's around me, and I agree. But I can't do that for 35 minutes. I'd look at the advertisements, which usually consists of some community college posters. My favorite is the Guggenheim one, which has been there for three months and should be taken down because the exhibit no longer exists.

I was standing there and I wasn't feeling sleepy so I kept my eyes opened. The young lady standing next to me was reading a book. I couldn't stop looking at her short blond hair. I wish there was some type of real life pinterest to collect everything I've seen that has inspired me. But I used my peripherals and I really wanted to ask her to turn around so I can look at the back of her head. Don't worry, I didn't do such a thing. But I kept glancing over. The three people who were seated in front of me all had their eyes closed. Actually, everyone seated had their eyes closed. It was awfully quiet for such a packed train. I couldn't see what stop it was and I hate it when you couldn't hear the conductor because for some season, he/she doesn't understand how to turn on the volume. I wasn't at a panic. I knew that after 59th, half the people leave the train anyway. "This is Canal. Next stop is Chambers. Stand clear of the closing doors." That's usually my cue to start walking to the door.

Sickness talk

2012-02-20T08:59:00.000-08:00

The last time I was sick and actually enjoying every second of it was second grade. It seems all of my great childhood memories were in that time. I was 8 or something. We were still living in a studio so my twin bed was in the living room along with my brother's. He had these really colorful dinosaur sheets. I can't recall what my sheets were like, but I'm sure it wasn't as awesome as his sheets since I can't even remember it. It was a school day and I wasn't in school. Instead I was under the covers, one of those thick, heavy, flowery ones. If you have any familiarity with Asians, you know what I'm talking about. There's always some type of pattern with some shade of red. My mother's had a peacock. Mine had huge red and pastel flowers all over. One side of the blanket felt silky so when you run your hand against it it'll smooth it out and everything looked perfect. That was one of my favorite things to do, petting the blanket. At least it behaved and didn't poop. It seems life was easier with this blanket because now I have an Ikea down comforter with those duvets and life isn't as easy. It's still very warm, but I can't pet it like my Asian blanket. My mother took the day off to take care of me. I remembered my great aunt (that's what I called her, though I really don't know how she was related to me but she was related) came over and gave me five dollars. I forgot why, but I remembered wanting to be sick all the time so I can get more five dollars. Five dollars could have gotten me ten fudge popsicles or ten bottles of lucas. Even though I was sick, if the ice cream truck came by, I'd rush out the door and run after it.

On these sick days, besides blowing my nose and filling up so many plastic bags with my used tissues, I watched television all day. Daytime television wasn't made for kids (I know because they always had soap operas that had stuff my eyes should have not seen as a child) and PBS became my favorite network. I never knew what PBS stood for, but knew that before and after every show, they always thanked me "like viewers like you, thank you" and I'd always reply "you're welcome!" I never watched Nickelodeon or cartoon network because I didn't have cable. I remember I'd lie to the kids at school when they asked me if I had cable. I told me that I had it once, but my father cancelled it because I wouldn't do my homework. Everyone believed it. I already knew I wasn't a typical kid, but I still wanted to fit in. So yeah, I used to have cable and watch TRL and Rugrats until my parents turned off our 20 inch tube.

Life as a sick child was not a struggle. Now at the ripe age of 23, I'm sick and there is a TV, a huge one actually, but it doesn't work. It sits quietly in our living room and constantly reminds me everyday that I am still poor. But it is quite encouraging because I really wish I can turn it on and watch The Notebook on there. Can you imagine Ryan Gosling's face on a 50 or so inch screen!? I ended up finishing The Catcher in the Rye instead. It makes me wish I wrote more during my teens angst years (what do you call angst in your early twenties? I feel like there should be a clever answer here and then that drum sound to state that it was a joke should play). But then, I wouldn't want to reread any of that because it'll just make me hate myself because I know how annoying I can be.

One thing I kind of like about being sick is my lost of taste and smell. It means I can make anything I wanted and it didn't matter how it tasted, as long as it filled me up. It means not being able to smell urine in the subways or smelling someone's fart, including my own. It means I can put sour cream and onion potato chips in my porridge and not be disgusted by it. But it also means I can't enjoy a freshly made avocado shake/smoothie or homemade angel hair pasta with mushroom and chicken alfredo sauce. I always feel these minor sicknesses happen to make us appreciate whatever that is hurting, more. Like when your elbow starts hurting for no reason and you begin to appreciate your elbow and pray to God that you won't ever mistreat your elbow ever again. I would think of other examples, but you know what I mean. You begin to give that part of your body more attention and tell everyone you encounter to be happy that theirs is functioning properly or at least looks normal. This reminds me a lot about people too, and how when someone gets sick, or gets mad or you, or something different happens to them and it changes your relationship negatively, you begin to focus on them and really appreciate them and wish you had done more and pray to God so many times to undo it all, to bring it back to the way it was before all of it happened.

Central Park

2012-02-14T23:03:00.000-08:00

I am in Missouri

2012-02-14T22:38:00.000-08:00

Six tracks for the train trip

2012-01-16T08:41:00.000-08:00

Alliteration, my friends. It would have been more impressive if I had done ten tracks, or two, or twenty two, but I wanted six. Six because it isn't five. Instead of the usual top five, this can be sexy six, selective six, salient six, oh, or even six songs!

I have a playlist on my spotify titled "subway" which features these six songs amongst others. Always on repeat, medium volume, so I can somewhat hear the conductor and not annoy everyone else on the train who's getting some shut eye before heading to work or home. Let's take the D and play these tunes!

Ou Est le Swimming Pool | Dance The Way I Feel
Panda Bear | Alsatian Darn
Snoop Dogg & Wiz Khalifa | Young, Wild and Free ft. Bruno Mars
El Ten Eleven | My Only Swerving
Cults | You Know What I Mean
SBTRKT | Hold On

The case of the heater

2012-01-13T14:18:00.000-08:00

Here are two stories. My mother's co-worker, an immigrant from China, turned on the kitchen faucet and had no idea how to turn it off. This wasn't a fancy faucet either. But I guess she didn't have such sinks where she came from, so this contraption became her enemy, and she was not winning the battle. She ended up calling 9-1-1 because it was an emergency. Her sink was overflowing, and if she didn't stop it, her whole house would flood! The firefighters came and turned off the faucet. How? He twisted the knob to off.

Story two: This man (my father's friend who's also from a foreign land) didn't know the that red lights meant stop and green meant go, so every time the light was red, he would drive and wonder why people were honking at him.

I was shaking my head when I heard these stories. How can anyone not know how to turn off a faucet or understand that red means stop? Isn't that universal? "Give me the greenlight" means go right? Come on, people!

And rightie tightie, leftie loosie. I've never actually typed that out, so it looks really awkward and cute at the same time. If I turn something towards the left it will loosen it and if I turn it towards the right, it will tighten it. That's exactly what I did to our heater. It started getting cold in the apartment so I tightened it because it was loose. The next day, my roommate layered up before bed (sweatpants, sweater, three blankets). Usually, he'd don his Harvard t-shirt and basketball shorts. The day after that, it was just unbearable. I walked around the apartment wrapped in a blanket, and spent the majority of my time in the kitchen or restroom because those were the two hottest spots. It was frustrating. How can our heater break? If ours is broken, that means everyone else in the building is freezing their toes off too! I went back to the source and turned the knob tighter. It was still cold. I googled and youtubed "how to fix a broken heater" but I didn't have the advance tools, and the heaters looked different from mine.

I called our super (I'm his favorite tenant).

"Yeah, it's really cold. Our heater is broken," I told him as he walked in the apartment.

"Really? It should be working. Which ones?"

I pointed to our room. "There, and in the living room."

He kneeled down and starting turning the knob towards the left. "Look, it was closed off. You have to loosen it so turn it to the left." He went to the living room and said the same thing. "It should start heating up in 20 minutes." And he left.

The poop story and how a kitty changed a life

2012-01-11T22:39:00.000-08:00

And then there were two. Two needy, breathing mammals. Lexy came in a Zappos box and left in a legit pet carrier. This time, he, I mean she, is plumpier and I hope happier. The last four days has been hell for her and her owners. The internet said to place her in a small room with her food and litter box. We didn't want her to urinate in our bedroom. We didn't want to walk around smelling like kitten droppings so we avoided the closet. And we didn't want our brand old 50 inch television that might have the possibility of working to not work at all. Our tiny black and white restroom became her new home. After this new piece of information, we moved the litter box, her green rice to riches food container, and her furry self to the restroom, closed the door, and went about living our lives. I felt like a tiger mom punishing my daughter because she didn't take off her shoes in the house. That night, the cat's constant meowing joined my roommate's snoring. And that continued for three nights.

"Have you seen the restroom yet?" asked my roommate one morning. I was snuggled under my comforter, ten minutes past my alarm.

"You should look," he said eagerly.

Last time the cat peed on the white towel, knocked over my tree oil face wash, and destroyed our soft toilet paper. I knew it. She had taken down the shower curtains! I knew those plastic hooks from Ikea weren't going to last.

To my relief, the shower curtains were still hanging.

"She shitted all over the tub," my roommate said. I pulled the shower curtains open and immediately pulled them back. There were little pebbles of poop on the right side of the tub and in the middle was a fat one in a shape of a wishbone. I knew it wasn't a big deal, at least it wasn't human poop, but this was bad. Poop is poop.

I can never be a mother. We decided to split the task: I pick up the small poops and he picks up the wishbone poop. It was a fair deal because there were more small poops. There has to be a better word than poop right? It's starting to sound too cute. Poop.

And that was the end of it. I didn't want to pick up shit every day and I didn't want the white towel to turn yellow. Lastly, I was tired of having to hide our toilet paper and needing to collect the right amount of toilet paper before I sat on the toilet. The cat wasted a week's worth of toilet paper and that was the last straw.

That night, a kind lady responded to our craigslist ad (it was in the for sale section for $65, changed to $35 when no one responded, and after the poop tub incident, it moved to the free section). Her and her kids came over, met Lexy, fell in love with her, and left with her and the 3.5 pound bag of friskies cat food. Never have I ever seen a kid so happy.

In the end, I realized that I really am not a cat lady or any kind of animal lady and if kitten poop freaks me out there is no way I can handle cute baby poops. During one of my uproars, I confidently and dramatically told my roommate "Remember how we shouldn't have regrets? Well, my biggest regret is getting this cat!" and I take that back. Because of this cat, we both added happiness to a child's life. We provided this kitten with a loving home, and overall, Lexy taught me that I should be careful next time before I allow anyone/anything in my life because when I realize it isn't working, I can't post it on craigslist and have someone else fix my problem.

We're somewhere and it isn't New York City

2012-01-02T00:24:00.000-08:00

It felt like a mile sprint to the Chinatown bus station during a brisk Tuesday morning.

Inbound and Outbound lines.

Paul Revere lived in this hood.

C-A-N-N-O-L-I

Darn, this gives the location away. But it was the best chowda I've had.

Everything looks good wrapped in lights.

Holocaust memorial.

The List

2011-12-22T09:04:00.000-08:00

Dear Santa,

I know we haven't met, well maybe that one time a few Christmases ago with Chloe, Fran, and Tim, but that didn't count because you didn't have your Rudolph with you. I'm assuming you still get a lot of handwritten letters, more than half is illegible and ungrammatical, so I thought I'd try it the digital way. With this, you won't need your glasses or a magnifying glass and you will instantly receive my Christmas list even though the holiday is only a few days away. You have your helpers reading random blogs right? Well if you're reading this, I guess my plan worked.

This will be the first Christmas I spend away from home. And it isn't like we do anything grand. Sometimes there's a small artificial tree, and sometimes my dad will use his artistic skills and hang the lights on the window (a few years back he had them dangling like necklaces which he admired for hours). But regardless of the absent physicality of the holiday, I had my family there.

All I want for Christmas is for my family and loved ones to have a peaceful and love-filled celebration. It might get lonely on the holidays for some, so please let them know they are never alone. Add some joy, some spontaneity, some hope, and show them a miracle? Just make sure to let them know they are loved.

I'm sure every child asks for this every year, and I think you are making progress.... it's slow but I see it coming. Let there be peace in this world. If not, let there be peace in our minds and hearts.

Now I'll give you a list of things I know you can get me. I'm on your nice list by the way. No excuses! If your talented elves can't make these in the workshop, let them know they can shop for most of these online. Sadly, a majority of them are sold out. Make it work!

Merry Christmas, Santa. Stay jolly.

A.P.C. Fox Fur Trim Snow Parka

									Electric Mixer

Evazan by N.Y.L.A.

Daphnea by Boutique 9

Your favorite album/songs

Your favorite book

Leather sofa

Kitchen stools

ASOS Premium Coat With Double Lapel

ASOS Oversized Quilted Lining Parka

Alpha Industries Faux Fur Hooded Fishtail Parka

Glove / Mitten

Beats by Dr. Dre Headphones from Monster

Michael Kors flat boot

Monthly pass NYC metrocard

Where are you?

2011-12-15T20:06:00.000-08:00

45 Days

2011-12-14T21:52:00.000-08:00

I've been meaning to post about how everything is going in New York, but I wanted to wait until the forty fifth day. If you were to ask me this question, the answer will depend on when you ask me. If you had asked me that today, I'd say "The weather has been warmer than usual. I wore sandals this evening to the laundromat which is 3 blocks from my apartment (yes I need to actually go outside my building to do laundry). It felt like an episode of Friends except that I wasn't Rachel and there was no Ross, but there was a laundry cart! And did you know that you can pick how many minutes you want on the dryer? A quarter for 7 minutes. 3 quarters is enough to dry all my clothes!" On bad days... well, I've been thinking about it and I can't really recall a seriously bad day. The only time was when I went to Uniqlo orientation and the lady dismissed me because I didn't have my passport. I sat on the subway with a pouty mouth and my head down, feeling almost like a sad Korean drama.

I can say that every day here has been different. There's actually reason to have a daily journal because I won't be writing in the same things. Oh shucks, too late for that now. In the 45 days, I signed a one year lease to an empty apartment that I'm sharing with one of my great friends from home. I found a part time job as a sales associate for Uniqlo (I just tried the heattech scoop neck shirt today and oh-em-gee it's always toasty and I love it). I'm getting real world experience of what it's like working in a magazine office. I've stepped inside Spin Magazine's office (sadly they decided to not hire any new spring interns). In the 45 days I've had many opportunities and misfortune. My 2012 schedule is still in the air as I'm waiting to hear back from shootdigital and Men's Fitness. In the 45 days, I've baked ciabatta bread, crack pie, brownies (twice in four days). Thanks to Phimy, I've had numerous nights of fun times and numerous mornings of hang overs. I would go on, but most importantly, in the 45 days I've been here, I've been constantly moving.

You know how when you apply for college, they always want to see how well you adapt to new environments? Well I don't even know why I typed that last sentence, but I can say I've adapted very well. New York City isn't very different from any other places I went to. Even when I went to Korea, I didn't feel estranged. Physically, there are differences. People are always around me whether I like it or not. I don't have my car to shield me from the rest of the world. When I want to go somewhere, I hop on the train, and become involved in other people's lives for a few seconds before my stop. In New York City, they take out the trash three times a week, meaning that three times a week, you'll see piles and piles of garbage bags on the curb. The buildings aren't as high as I imagined them to be, the people aren't as "aggressive" and it isn't as chaotic. And I have to say, I honestly suck at blogging because I never have a focus. Sorry.

Now to answer the question: how's life in New York City? Life is being lived.

Babycakes NYC cupcakes

2011-12-13T20:39:00.000-08:00

Big news from New York! Meet my new umbrella!

2011-11-17T22:09:00.000-08:00

It isn't shy and doesn't like to hide in purses. It protects me from the rain and from foul strangers.

And the handle is translucent. You need to see it in real life. Oooh Ahhh.

To open, you just push it up half an inch...

and the umbrella will open. Extremely sturdy. I think it will not flip over when the wind attacks me.

Perfect coverage. For me and a few other people who happen to forget their umbrella. Sharing is caring.

Do you see me? I love my new umbrella!

Photographs by: Claire Wang

In this moment

2011-11-17T20:41:00.000-08:00

My friend texted me saying "Life is crazy." Why? "Idk I didn't think I would ever hear back from anyone" and it made me realize that I haven't actually reflected on this life of mine. Because it really has been CRAZY. Crazy in the best sensible amazing awesome way. There are two types of crazy. The "My ex-gf was fucking crazy"crazy or your friend's reaction when you tell the story of you sitting on the subway and realizing Ryan Gosling is next to you and you both engage in an intimate conversation about which power ranger was your favorite and he gladly adds his phone number in your phone and decides to hold your hand as you both step off the subway to lead a life of eternal bliss and she responds with "O-M-G that's crazy!" My crazy is the latter. To a certain extent.

I love that feeling when things are happening. Anything, like even getting an email a response from someone, that sense of communication that life is moving forward because I hate feeling stuck and I am the most impatient person. I like for things to happen all the time. There has to be change and movement.

Does that mean that I get bored easily? No. It just means that I can't settle for something that I'm not happy with. For example, my internship during the summer was a blessing. Not only was I paid a good amount of money, but I contributed to the sales team and felt like I did a lot of good things there. The work wasn't hard and my colleagues became my friends. But after 6 months, I knew I couldn't stay there long because I didn't see myself there. I thought to myself that when someone asks me in five years "so what have you done so far" I don't want to have to say "I've been working at that place that I interned for." Period. The end. I don't think I like straight lines. I tend to get from point A to B by visiting J and saying a quick hi to L and sometimes sadly approach Z to have to get to B. And I think that's the story I want to tell. Jeez, I'm all about stories huh? It probably goes back to freshmen year in my music cluster where my professor asked everyone "What is the meaning of life" or something along that line. And he said "stories." As in, life is all about stories. Every time we talk to someone, we are telling a story. Everything we do is a story. There's a beginning, middle, end to everything we do. Think about it. When you come home and your roommate asks you how your day was, you tell her a story about your day. The action of you walking in and your roommate asking you a question and you replying is a story. Beginning: You walk in. Middle: Roommate asks how you're doing. Ending: You respond by telling her your day. Everything is a sharing, communicating. And that leads me to the eulogy written by Steve Jobs' sister where she states "We all — in the end — die in medias res. In the middle of a story. Of many stories." Okay that was kind of depressing and does not work well with this entry, but there you have it.

And now I'm in the story and I am the author. I'm no longer going through the motions (and I'm glad I have motions to go through) but now the motions and going through me. I just thought that would sound cool by switching it around, by saying that I am now in control.

If you haven't noticed, I'm talking on a high right now. I feel like I'm on cloud 9 (seriously, there has to be a better expression to express my euphoria at this moment). And why am I so over the moon? Because things are happening! Leaves are falling! People are moving! Rain is falling! Sun is shining! Subways are moving! Music is playing! Everything is functioning correctly. Leaves should be falling now. People should constantly be moving. The rain should fall. The sun should shine. The subways should move. And music should always be playing. It's that moment where you begin to realize that you're glad certain things happened in the past because if it didn't you wouldn't be where you are at this moment. I'm glad I didn't get that copywriting internship. Maybe it was a good thing I decided to take Vietnamese class instead of Spanish. And to go even further back, I'm extremely blessed and thankful my parents sacrificed everything for me to be where I am right now. In this moment, I feel infinite. In this moment.

A short of list of things I shoulda coulda woulda packed

2011-11-13T19:54:00.000-08:00

1) My passport Obviously, right? But then again I wasn't planning on telling my parents that I was leaving. Asking my dad to hand me over the passport is suspicious. Where are you going, he'll ask me. And so, I realized that since I'll be traveling within the U.S., a passport is unnecessary. And I am dumb to have left it there because having my brother FedEx it to me costed thirty dollars. That to me is practically my week's worth of food! Always bring your passport because you'll need it when you have a job. Hello.
2) Running shoes I know I fake it. I don't exercise but I do own a pair of Nike's running shoes. I sometimes dress up, ready for the gym, and I end up watching Glee on Hulu and constantly trying to keep a straight posture. But I should have brought them here, where the scenery is amazing! And I have no excuses. Back home I lived three blocks from the park. Here, I live less than two blocks from THE park (Central Park if you haven't figured that out already). And running always makes me feel good. I never regret it.
3) Books If you know me, I love to buy used books. I love to read especially when I get the chance. I never had a chance in LA. I do now! My subway ride to work is approximately 30 minutes, and in those thirty minutes, I watch others on the subway read. I saw one very pretty young blond girl reading Lord of the Rings! It's the best opportunity read my favorite book, in front of all the strangers.
4) ~~Headphones~~ Nevermind. I'd rather listen to the hustle and bustle of the city.

I am thrilled that LA Times had a story about the tree!

2011-11-08T08:39:00.000-08:00

So I am extremely excited about this. I came upon this article when I was on the LA Times trying to be up to date with news back home. This is so not an LA story, but I loved it anyways because it is relevant to me! Rockefeller Center Christmas tree is coming to town (shh!) reads the headline. The shh! made me feel giddy for some reason! I'm not sure why it is so newsworthy that a special tree is coming into town, but I am all for it. The tree lighting at the Rockefeller Center is so... New York City. And I love it. I sound like a goof ball but I'm extremely thrilled to be here, especially during the holidays. I can't wait to go ice skating at Central Park, make ugly snowmen, wear snow boots, watch Elf and cuddle up in my scarves and hats and layers and layers of warmth!

More posts will be arriving, soon enough. I'm scouring for amazing one $ sign cafes in NYC, which is where I will do my postings once a week because I cannot spend 5 dollars each day on a drink!

Rihanna's We Found Love music video reminds me of...

2011-10-26T10:46:00.000-07:00

Cee Lo Green's No One's Gonna Love You (which is a cover from Band of Horses). Just a tad. Now, aren't you glad you're single!? Enjoy!

Lessons from a stranger

2011-10-24T23:59:00.000-07:00

What goes around comes around Hey girl, is he everything you wanted in a man, something something hand. I wonder if he knew about this song? And he's right. It's similar to the treat others as you would want to be treated. If you get mad when someone cuts you off, you shouldn't be doing that to others. Believe in karma.

The answer "no" makes me want it more Okay, this does not pertain to abuse or any forced sexual encounter. But I told him about how difficult it was to get a part time job. For him, when someone tells him no, it drives him further to get that yes. He tells me of when he had to do cold calls everyday to advertise his business, and out of the twenty calls, only one or two people said yes. It didn't matter how many people rejected him. The few that accepted him made it all worth it.

Finish what you started That's what she said! I just ruined that joke, didn't I? When he said this, he was referring to relationships, specifically for men. For example, if you buy flowers for your girl every week, or call to say good night before bed, you can't stop doing that. Yes, you did all this to lure her in your special web, but you have to keep going even after you've got the girl. Finish what you started. Once you stop, she will notice and assume something is wrong. So advice for ya'll would be to not even start.

Men are dogs, women are cats Dogs chase cats, cats do not chase dogs. For some reason, women love the chase, and they love a man who will fight for them.

Make it happen but do it legally. If you want something, you have to make that happen.

When you have children, you have to give them the best even if that means giving it up for adoption because you don't have the means to take care of the child. In the end, you'll be happy and that child will be happy if he/she is raised in the right household. You can reconnect later, and if he/she does not want to connect with you, it is fine. No matter what, when you have a child, you have to reassure that they will be taken care of in every aspect. Be sure that you are ready to have kids because it is the biggest responsibility you'll ever have.

Don't be intimidated by anyone, we are all human This was geared towards men being intimidated by strong powerful women. Who cares if she is a doctor, or president of a country, she is still a woman and she has needs and wants a man. Her career, or anyone's career/education/financial status should not be a main focus in picking a mate. If I connect with you, that is all that matters. In the end, we are all equal, all human beings with similar needs.

You have to make yourself happy because your partner can never do that for you. They can add more happiness to your life, but they can not make you happy. And if they do make you happy, it will only be temporary. If this is the case, you need to get out of the relationship until you are happy with yourself. Don't expect someone else to fulfill that.

If you want to make money, focus on senior citizens (baby boomers) or generation y because the U.S. population is getting older and kids like us will always want the latest technology (this includes social media)

Don't stress over what you cannot control There is no need. You are wasting your energy over something that is out of your hands. No matter how much you stress, it will or will not happen. If are in a control of a situation, make sure you prepare and do what you can for the best results. If you have no control, let it go. What will happen will happen. Stop worrying.

Andy needed a photo for his Linkedin account

2011-10-23T20:48:00.000-07:00

Tie time

Can you sit there and look cool?

Normal Andy

Nice shorts

Andy and his weapon

LA AIDS WALK for Somaly Mam Foundation (and Jessica!)

2011-10-16T22:24:00.000-07:00

I blame Steve Jobs

2011-10-15T23:44:00.000-07:00

In his commencement speech at Stanford University, the man said:

"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."

Though I've always seen life in this light (special thanks to the American media) Steve Jobs gave it a stamp of approval. The man indeed put a ding in the universe and he's certainly inspired me to venture off, to stay hungry, to stay foolish. And foolish I am to be flying off to New York for an internship that pays significantly less my current one during this economic situation.

I am exchanging stability for uncertainty, income for experience, cars for subways, cardigans for coats, and LA for NYC.

I know. I've already written an invitation to myself: Welcome to the I'm-going-to-NYC-to-follow-my-dreams club. And it's not really following my dreams, it's more creating myself and figuring out what I'm made of. I really don't know exactly what I want to do, but I only have an idea. Remember my rant about me being super spoiled? Well, this will break that mold. My vague plan is to have the internship, work part time during the evenings and Fridays/Saturdays and explore New York Sundays. See, I've got it covered. I've got 3-5 months to make something out of nothing.

As for my parents, they don't understand it, but they're letting me go. My brother recorded it all so I got to be Kim Kardashian for twenty minutes. I really wanted to type out how the conversation went, but it's on film, and yes, I'm lazy again. However, after the confrontation, I wrote this draft on my blog:

Guilt. Nonchalant, Almost careless. Go and try. It's such an American thing. My father doesn't know, and I know he will only worry about the housing crisis. I, too, worry. It's selfish of me, but by me staying, what will that do? Progress is not made.

going to new york in two weeks.
lonely. sad. letting go. money situation.
mother supportive. not yelling.
moved on to car problems.
cardboard dividing the room.
mom mad she threw it down.
my own reality show.
don't wear heels.
my brother recording it all.
"why leave for a lesser income?"
major counts.
3 months will go by so quickly.
bring cats over.
she already bought a plane ticket.
her boyfriend lives there.
why leave when things are so good?
let her do it for 3 months she'll come back.
my mom silly, playing and patting his face.
how much is it?
enough. it's enough.
experience over money.
why?
caught on tape.
sound silly but let's see how it is.

sadness. a new chapter. prove them wrong. i'm so hopeful and i know it won't be so good.

Yeah, if you understood half of that, I congratulate you. Overall, it turned out to be one of the best conversations I've had with my parents. Instead of yelling at me when I proclaimed my plans, my father said in a calm voice, "But that's so far. I'll be sad."

I'm spoiled and it is rotten

2011-10-12T14:46:00.000-07:00

My tolerant mother has taken care of me for twenty two years and never received an income or even a promotion for her magnanimous efforts of raising a poor Vietnamese speaking mercurial daughter. With great admittance, I am a spoiled brat.

After I turned 18 and went off to college, I really thought I was a true adult. But I found myself going home on weekends shamefully so my mother could do my laundry. I wake up past noon and next to my bed will be a plate of perfectly cut up gauva accompanied by the greatest concoction ever: salt, pepper, and cayenne pepper. It's truly a Vietnamese thing (the dip and the motherly behaviors). I figured this type of behavior would diminish by the time I turn 21, the age where I can legally drink, rent a car, buy a car without a co-signer, buy a house without a co-signer, and gamble. How come when I turned 21, all I did was drink until I couldn't anymore? I should have gone and rented a car!

The realization that I've yet to seriously grow up occurred one morning before I went off to work. My morning routine is trite and amazingly lazy: wake up at 6:35, drag myself to the restroom, pee, brush my teeth, wash my face, attempt to comb my hair, give up and tie it in a ponytail, change, and go to the kitchen. All of that takes an impressive ten minutes. I'm independent during those 10 minutes. On this particular morning, I slipped on a black dress because I didn't feel like using my muscles trying to squeeze into my fitted pants. As I walked into the kitchen, I stood by the cabinet, waiting for my mother. "Chờ đợi một phút" she says as she places bags of fruits and a napkin in my black lunch pail. "đồ ăn nóng" she says as she hands it to me. She basically told me to wait a minute and that the food is hot. I grabbed the handle, thanked her, grabbed my car keys, put on my black flats, and walked out the door. My mother loves to watch me as I leave, and I always wondered if I'll do that when I become a mother.

She runs back in the house and comes out with a strip of stickers, the same one she uses to clean up the cat hair on the floor. Though my brother and I bought her a lint/pet fur roller, she prefers the stickers because she has more control and it's more effective, she claims. And there I was, standing in the walkway with my arms stretched out like scarecrow s she patted the stickers all over my dress as if I was going through security. "Mèo lông" she says. It means "cat fur" a word she's been using since my brother brought home Blue and Willow a year ago. My black dress was covered in tiny orange cat fur. In that moment, I imaged a helicopter aiming it's spotlight at me standing there with my mom on her knees intricately patting the stickers all over my dress, reporting to the news anchor "breaking news, a 22 year old woman is delayed from going to work because of apparent cat fur on her dress. Her mother is quickly ridding of the contamination."

After a minute, I told her it looks good and that I couldn't see the cat fur anymore. I thanked her, and casually walked towards my car. I place the lunch pail in the passenger seat, put on my seatbelt, turn on the engine, and drive off with NPR on the radio encouraging me to donate money for their Fall drive.

This will be my last meal

2011-10-11T22:05:00.000-07:00

BLAT

Fresh cut fries

Homemade Bun Bo Hue

AYCE KBBQ: Pork Belly

Rocky Road and Butter Pecan Thrifty ice cream

Homemade salsa (with tortilla chips)

Fresh oysters

Homemade Banh Xeo

The best hot dogs I've ever had was at Hot Doug's in Chicago

2011-10-11T21:28:00.000-07:00

The Dog: Chicago Style with all the trimmings

Foie Gras and Sauternes Duck Sausage with truffle aioli, foie gras mousse and fleur de sel

Fresh cut fries fried in duck fat

The Sal Tessio: Italian Sausage

Sharing is for lovers

Chicago, Illinois

2011-10-11T20:48:00.001-07:00

My mother says the darnest things

2011-10-11T20:19:00.000-07:00

Since my mom was in the room with me when I typed the previous post, I realized I couldn't keep this joyous video to myself! She was already annoyed that I was still at the computer, when I should have been dropping off some goodies for a friend. However, she complied and watched it with me. Here's what happened before, during, and after the viewing of this video.

Me (pretend it's in Vietnamese and words in caps are in English)

Mom, do you want to watch a PROPOSAL?

Mom

What?

I open a new tab and typed google translator. I typed in the word proposal and show it to her.

Didn't Dad do this for you?

Mom

No. Why would he have to ask me?
We already know we were getting married.
In Vietnam, you don't date around.

Okay, well, in America they do this and usually
the girl doesn't know when to expect the proposal.

I press play on the YouTube page.

So that's her in the red. She doesn't know what's going on.

Mom

She doesn't know that this will be on YouTube?

Yes. And she doesn't know that he's proposing.

Mom

What? She doesn't know she's marrying him?
Why would he not tell her beforehand?
Doesn't she need time to think about it before she decides?

Random people begin to dance.

Mom

Are they exercising?

I'm irritated.

No, they're dancing. Do you hear the music?

Mom

It's nice music.

Now more people are joining the dancing routine.

Mom

Dancing is good exercise.
Exercise is very similar to dancing.

Mom just watch.

Mom

How come you don't like to dance?
You should dance like that. It's good for you.

Okay just watch.

Mom

Vietnamese people love dancing.
Exercising is very similar. Good for them.

Look, the boyfriend is dancing too.

Mom

Why isn't she dancing?
Does she not like to exercise?
She probably can't dance.

The dancing finally stops and the proposal speech begins. The girl is giggling.

Mom

Her teeth looks like yours before you had braces.
I can see them. Very crooked.

I ignore her and proceed to translate the speech... poorly.

He's saying he loves her and stuff like that.

My mom leaves the room.

Wait keep watching.

Mom

It's not done yet?

In the video he asks "Will you marry me?" She responds "duhhh" with a self conscious laugh.

Wasn't that fun?

Mom

Ahhh that is fun. They're oohing and ahhing because they
want you to go and give your friend his desserts already.

End Scene.

I'm glad I don't have to do the proposing

2011-10-11T19:44:00.000-07:00

I used to think being a girl sucked. It's calamitous. I bleed monthly, I'm easily agitated, I have to be extremely careful with my mating habits, and I'm in charge of popping a 6-10 pound baby out of my thinger (just imagine pooping out a full turkey). Besides undergoing the natural processes, everything else is easy. I'm talking about relationships in the narrowest form. Politics aside, boys have a more difficult time than girls (with homosexual relationships I'm not so sure).We, in a fairy tale world, don't do the chasing. We give out numbers, sometimes fake numbers. We have the power to make or break someone's heart. Boys have the tough job - they have to put up with our hormonal moods and compete with Ryan Gosling and Johnny Depp and whoever the male protagonist is in all the Nicolas Sparks' idyllic love novels (I pick the cutie in A Walk To Remember who said "love is the like the wind, you can't see it but you can feel it" marry me now please).

Girls expect a lot from their partners and they have every right to. We all want the best. We do not want to settle with just any guy (please don't ever settle even if he's a millionaire or he has your child). Girls predict everything and anything. We (or maybe just me) have an imagination that's bigger than any romantic movie/ Korean drama. We know what we want. So can you imagine how tough it is for your partner to come up with the most original, creative, memorable proposal!? I'm having a headache even thinking about it! Poor boys. What sucks more is that certain proposals gain more attention than others because they're the best ones (and they're not from a movie!) and thanks to youtube, you and your partner are able to join in on the event. Doesn't that just suck? You're both watching it, your girl is crying, one because it's so romantic and two because this idea has already been done and she wasn't a part of it, meaning you have large shoes to fill even though you don't even know this guy who did this stunt but you loath him so much for setting the bar so high.

Below are two proposal videos that I thought were heart warming (I usually end up watching every single related video I can find but this one satisfied me). Well, the first one made me cry. The second one (recommended to me by a friend) I wasn't too thrilled about. I would go on and on about the reasons why I loved the first one so much, but..I'll go on forever and we both will not have any sleep. Watch and weep! If you have a significant other and foresee a future with them, be nice.

My best conversations are with strangers

2011-09-29T09:01:00.000-07:00

In the past two weeks, my best conversations have been with strangers. During the off hours of my yard sale, I chatted with a man in crutches who happened to stop by because he was taking his weekly stroll to Main street. We jabbered on about the sport of fishing and renovations going on in Alhambra. Everything boiled down to the simple answer "It's the bad economy." A few hours before, Mohommad came by again looking for a water boiler, the one that whistles when its ready. He had stopped by earlier that morning to pick up five dollar speakers (my dad had them in the garage for 10 years). I forgot what we talked about, but it felt like I've known him for years. But out of all the conversations I've had with these new faces, my 5 minute meeting regarding vinyl application printing turned 2 hour meeting about the idiosyncrasies of life with the Femi is my favorite.

"Hi, are you Sami?" I asked the man at the front desk. "Ah, yes it's Femi," he responded with a huge smile. I loved his Nigerian accent. I showed him the samples we wanted for him to print, and he laughed the whole time because I really was very ignorant about the printing process. "That," he pointed to a poster of three dogs' butts in bikinis, "that was a strange project. These customers invented diapers for dogs. I tell you, Americans love their pets! Where I come from, he feed them and had them to eat the bugs around the house, but we don't sleep with them. If you want to make money, work in a business with pets!"

It's a great conversation when you can't pinpoint exactly how you got to the topic. We went from talking about dimensions and cost of the printing to talks about education, dating, life mantras, technology, tailoring, and many other topics. When I drove back, I kept trying to think how we even went off topic. Most conversations I have with vendors are direct Q and A's. How much will this cost? Do you know how long it will take? How long have you had this shop? With Femi, stories seem to sprout and we both were inspired by each other's recollections.

Femi was born in Nigeria and came to southern california when he was 24. He studied at Cal State Long beach and transferred to UCLA majoring in some type of Health field. I was surprised at how many things we had in common. He also worked in Alhambra for 10 years after he graduated. Well hello, I'm from there! At first, I thought he was just being a great businessman, telling me what I wanted to hear. If that was the case, he was a great businessman. I was reassured that he was simply conversing to converse when he mentioned the Chinese Islamic Restaurant on Garvey. How can anyone make that up? I've always driven by this restaurant called "Chinese Islamic Restaurant" and I couldn't understand how that worked. I didn't know Chinese people knew Islamic people even existed.

"My daughter lived in the dorms for one year and moved out because of me. All the friends she met there lived in mansions in Beverly Hills! I told her I couldn't go and buy her a new BMW. Meet new people!" His daughter, who is now 33 years old working with clinical social worker something (I'm not very good with medical professions) in Nevada. She's married to the greatest guy on Earth (he cooks, cleans, takes care of the baby, does chores, and anything you can think of that men never enjoy doing. And he does it without her nagging him. )

"Her boyfriend in college was a bad one. He had no job and no respect. He would drive her car, drop her off of school, and go somewhere. I said, if I'm paying for this car and the insurance and this kid is driving it, I will not allow that! I ask her, Honey why are you dating this guy, you deserve so much better." He looked at me and asked "How old are you?" His daughter was 24 when she finally broke it off - 6 long years.

"You are young. I learned that I couldn't tell her what to do. She will learn herself, from her own mistakes," he said expressively, his arms motioning towards his chest, "She did not listen to me. But I knew if I stopped nagging her, she will eventually learn on her own."

Femi began telling me about his first girlfriend, who he wanted to marry, but couldn't because of racial issues. He didn't want to be with a mother-in-law who disapproved of him because of his color. Now, at the age of 55 (I say add 5 more years because colored people age sp gracefully) he's living in Long Beach and his girlfriend lives in Cincinnati. He dreams of ending his career at the sign shop and wants to open an adult daycare center.

"People now are very selfish, that is why relationships don't last. You have to gain trust, and that takes time. Find someone who will be patient to grow with you. Be secure, independent. You both can have your own lives but don't be selfish. Give to give, not to expect something in return. All you want is love in return, right? What else do you need?"

He began to laugh when he gave an example of what he meant. "I love football, so I go to bars to watch it with other fans. She calls me on my phone, so I step outside to talk to her." He put his hands over his ears and speaks into it like a phone "I'm at the bar watching the game right now."

"See, instead of accepting it and asking me what I'm doing and how the game was, she told me to go back inside and to call her when he is done. So I call her later, but she was asleep because of the time difference." He began doing a texting with his hands, and with a laugh, said "And so I texted her "honey I'm sorry I called so late I will call you tomorrow!"

"You need to know how to live your own life. When your partner is gone, you don't need to talk to them every second and know exactly where they went, who they went with. You need to trust that they are living their life and you live yours. This trust, it does not start at the beginning. You gain it, and it takes years."

Maybe his wrinkles aren't apparent not only because he has great genes, but of his whimsical, some might even say illogical look at life. "Don't worry too much. What will happen will happen. I never stress because I know things will be good. Have faith, embrace the cultures of life, and form meaningful relationships."

My stomach began to growl and I realized lunchtime had passed an hour ago. A customer walked in, which was my cue to end my talks with Femi. I thanked him, grabbed the airplane acrylic models, and walked out the store. If it takes 2 hours to get a quote from Femi about a project, I'd go back and do it all over again.

FREE DIDDY RIESE COOKIES ICE CREAM SANDWICH

2011-09-26T08:16:00.000-07:00

You heard me - Free! Yes, Diddy Riese, the original Diddy Riese in Westwood, CA. The line will be long, but the wait is truly worth it. You get your choice of cookies and your choice of ice cream! This free deal is only available at MunchOnMe.com. Grab it now! It ends October 2!

Rules to a Successful Yard Sale

2011-09-25T21:31:00.000-07:00

1. Place your ad on craigslist. Only place one ad because people you don't want to sound like a broken record. When you place this ad, put some thought into it. People like to be entertained when they read, and can you imagine how many generic yard sale ads there are out there?
2. Create huge yard sale signs. Use cardboard and place them on the back of your car. Because most cities don't allow for posting on public property, a car will suffice. Now, be strategic in where you put these signs. Place them on both corners of your street, and place them on main roads that will lead to your street.
3. Your sign should be simple. Don't write information, or even your address. Rather, direct the driver. Write Yard Sale in large letters and draw an arrow towards your location (make sure to fill it in and make it as thick as possible). People like being led. If they see your sign on a main street, they will follow the arrow. They'll then see another sign that will lead them to where you are.
4. Be nice to your customers. This means greet them with a nice hello when they walk across your yard. Don't go and stand next to them because that will only make them leave. Give them their space. If they have questions, they'll ask. Or, you can ask "is there anything specific you're looking for?" Having a conversation makes them feel at ease, and if they like what you're selling and they like you, they will tell their friends and will come back later. I promise you! And when they leave, tell them "Thank you!"
5. Place prices on your items. Use masking tape and write down the price for big items. You have to realize it's a yard sale and people are here looking for deals. Even though that stereo system costed you 100 dollars ten years ago, it doesn't mean it is worth 100 now.
6. When a customer really wants your item at a certain price, let them have it in the end. For example, my dad had this ugly heavy water filter that I had no hope of selling. Really, who would want that!? But, I was proven wrong. My dad was selling it for 20. The Chinese man said 13. My dad said 15. The Chinese man said 13. And finally, my dad accepted it for 13. The whole point of a yard sale is to get rid of these items. If you end up making a couple bucks, that's just an added bonus.
7. Bring a lawn chair and sit far away from the site. I find it intimidating when I walk into a store, and there is someone staring straight at me. Just sit in the background and let the customer shop. Don't be in their way.
8. If at all possible, make your yard sale last the whole day. This means from sunrise to sunset. You'll be surprised how many people will come by, especially those who take their daily walk around the neighborhood.

Bon Iver at Shrine Auditorium

2011-09-25T21:06:00.000-07:00

My nap two hour nap was over. It was 7pm and the Bon Iver concert was at 8. I did a quick change up and walked out the door in my beloved black Beatles shirt circa 2007 and khaki shorts. I was so ready for a concert. We were lucky enough to find parking spot right across the street from the Shrine Auditorium. Once we got there, I felt like the purple elephant in a tutu balancing itself on a unicycle. EVERYONE, and I mean everyone including Michael looked like they just walked out of the Opening Ceremony's Fall lookbook. They were a sophisticated bunch dressed in shabby chic outfits with vintage leather purses and tousled i-just-woke-up-but-my-hair-looks-perfect- look. Me? I looked like I exited the wrong freeway and missed my Warped Tour stop 5 miles back. Indeed, I did a long look around the lobby to see if there there were others who were unprepared like me. Even the security guard looked the part.

This entry is about Bon Iver, not about me.

This concert was a week ago, and everything I felt was a week ago. I knew I should have blogged right when I got home! I'll create a quick phone conversation I had with Francois from my memory about this spectacular event along with other additives.

Me: You missed out. It was frucking amazing. Best concert I've ever been to. Lady Gaga is now numero uno.

Franois: I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Me: No, I more than enjoyed it! It was such an out of body experience. I feel exhausted even though I sat there the entire time minus the last ten minutes when the whole audience was on their feet! Think Coldplay mixed with Brand New and Arcade Fire, even though I've never seen them live. Did you know there's 9 people in Bon Iver!?

Francois: I did not know that.

Me: I had no idea there were that many instruments! I saw a saxophone, trumpet, french horn, two drums, piano, and other instruments that I can't even name. Usually, I look at the lead singer and anyone else who is cute in the band. But this time, I paid attention to every single person on that stage. It was just... raw music.

Francois: Wow, that sounds really good.

Me: IT WAS! I don't know how to describe it!

Jeez, how annoying am I. I apologize that I can't creatively write about this experience. I've played it in my head many times about how I'd describe the concert, but it seems it's indescribable. You just had to be there.

New York Fashion Week Spring 2011

2011-09-25T15:36:00.000-07:00

Hello my two loyal followers. As you can tell, I had more time to look over the Spring 2012 collection. After looking at these beautiful garments and realizing the majority of my favorite designers are men, I dreamt of marrying a fashion designer. And then a good friend told me that all they'll do is BLEEP the models and ignore me or cheat on me with another man. Le sigh. Anyways, these are the outfits I currently have in my closet. Oh yeah.

Charlotte Ronson

United Bamboo

Oscar de la Renta

Marchesa

Zero + Maria Cornejo

Chris Benz

Donna Karan

Honor

J.Mendel

Suno

Yigal Azrouel

BCBG

Alexander Wang

3.1 Phillip Lim

Michael Kors

Proenza Schouler

Theyskens' Theory

New York Fashion Week Fall 2011

2011-09-25T15:14:00.000-07:00

I didn't have a chance to look through every collection of New York Fashion Week Fall 2011 (and I never will) but here are a couple of my favorites from some of the collections I browsed through on Vogue's website.

3.1 Phillip Lim

Michael Kors

Chloé

Michael Kors

Proenza Schouler

Michael Kors

Thai Beef Salad (video!)

2011-09-18T22:15:00.000-07:00

I made Thai Beef Salad (and it was delicious) and my brother recently got a new camera. So, I told him to document this special moment of me actually cooking at home. Note that this isn't a guide on how to make the salad (to my two readers if you want the recipe, just text me :P).

It's a rough cut, and hopefully we'll have more time to edit this again properly. Play it on mute because the music ain't bringing on the action! Enjoy!

Gym Class Heroes: Stereo Hearts ft. Adam Levine

2011-09-09T11:29:00.000-07:00

I'm getting sick of a lot of songs on the radio (I'll make a list soon enough) and when this song came on, I didn't want it to end! I know I'm liking it now because it's fresh, but what's not to love when Adam Levine is involved?

Travis McCoy and his band Gym Class Heroes are back with a new hit since Cupid’s Chokehold (if you remember, his ex Katy Perry before she kissed a girl) starred in the music video. She’s still present in this song also when he raps “Furthermore, I apologize for any skipping track / It's just the last girl that played me left a couple cracks” Awww.

This time around, the track features Maroon 5’s frontman Adam Levine and a better sing-along chorus that makes more sense than “not much of a girlfriend, I never seem to get a lot.” Am I being biased here? Yes! I would choose Adam Levine’s voice over Fall Out Boy’s Patrick Stump any day. But even the less obsessed will fall in love with this song on the first listen and seriously go searching for someone and force them to serenade this to you. It really brings to life the classic love scene in “Say Anything” that has forever made it more impossible for the average man to find a mate. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, look it up! Perhaps watch it on mute and play this song instead!

Gym Class Heroes: Stereo Hearts ft. Adam Levine

Fastrak Ticket Tip

2011-09-07T13:33:00.000-07:00

This is quick entry for anyone (not from Bay Area) that might get a Fastrak ticket.

First, when you cross the bridge, you'll see many toll booths. Do not drive past the Fastrak lanes (even if it's 2am). Instead, go to a booth where there's a person there, and pay 4 or 6 dollars for a pass.

But if you did drive through, it won't be 100 dollars. My friend who lived around the Bay Area told me the ticket was going to be severe. To my pleasant surprise, it was only $30 which is a huge relief! It says that you don't have to pay the $30 if you sign up for Fastrak online. Don't do it unless you're planning on driving to SF daily/weekly. Yes, you don't have to pay $30, but signing up is not free. It costs $25 to sign up the the account, and some other complicated monthly fees.

When you go to pay your violation it'll say IMPORTANT NOTE: If you are a first-time toll violator, and you are not currently a FasTrak customer, you can have your violation penalty dismissed by opening a new FasTrak account sounds good huh!? Nope. Opening a new account costs $25.
My suggestion is to man up and pay the $30 dollars. And don't do it again!

"In my experience, the worse high school is, the better your adult life seems to be."

2011-09-06T13:07:00.000-07:00

Thank you Alia Shawkat (I only recognized Jack Black and Zooey Deschanel, sorry) who posted this on Rookie Mag (aimed towards teenagers - I'm 22).

Alia Shawkat writes: "In my experience, the worse high school is, the better your adult life seems to be."

Lesley Arfin writes: "You might feel at times that you are ugly and disgusting and unlovable. Some of you might feel as though you are beautiful and hot and cool and awesome. Know this: When you’re in your 20s you go through, like, a time machine of opposite days."

After reading these posts, I began to formulate my fate. It seems like most outcasts in high school turn out to be beautiful, successful ducklings. Haven't you seen the Maury show where the nerdy buck-teeth skinny girl turns into a sex kitten (and sometimes an exotic dancer) and she's there to tell her high school crush,"Look at me now, bitch."

From looking at Facebook, it does seem to be the case. Total nerds, weirdos, anti-athletes are now working their way towards medical school, attending grad school, or even owning their own business. The rest are extending their high school career through their 20s, getting drunk with the same clique of people, and having a mediocre lifestyle in their hometown. Of course this is not true for everyone, but that seems to be the trend.

It scares the cow out of me because I don't know where I stand. I had a good high school experience. Of course, if I knew this conclusion that most of the writers have concluded, I would have gone back and forced myself to hate high school. I can't say I was an outsider, or the strange girl who never talked in class and always had a book in her hand. But I wasn't the popular homecoming queen with the buff football boyfriend. I was an AP student, a yearbook nerd, and a highly enthusiastic (it makes up for my lack of talent) volleyball player, and highly emotional teenage girl with a social appetite. By looking at this, it seems I will fall into the "mediocre" category and that terrifies me. I'm starting to find that I'm becoming less social, and just less of everything I used to be in high school. Is that the affect it's taking? Am I slowly morphing into an outcast? Well, maybe I'm a step behind and this phase in my life now is my high school phase and in four years, I'll blossom into a beautiful butterfly. I'm trying my best to make myself feel better, sorry! I like extremes, and I really hope to goodness I can achieve that and break this pattern of mediocrity.

Lastly, I'll end with a positive note to everyone who might kinda sorta feel what I feel (if you understand, please inform me because even I don't know myself).

Dan Savage writes: Sometimes the problem isn’t who you are, despite what you’re being told by everyone around you, but where you are. And sometimes the solution can be as simple as finding a new place, a better place, the kind of place where a kid like you can thrive. Your place is out there. Go find it."

Thank you Mr. Savage!

This also inspired me and you can read the rest here.

"All I can say is, take risks while you can. Believe in yourself, search for your happiness and experience new things. You have the money, you have the time. Don’t waste any of it."

Regardless, don't let this scare you. Don't evaluate your high school life and think that is how your entire life will be. You're constantly in control of your life. As for me, I need to stop making up excuses for my current ailment and stop putting the fault onto others. I don't necessarily know what I want, but I do know what I don't want. I don't want to have to write another entry like this again!

Septemberagus, Chicktember, Mashed Potembers

2011-09-01T21:12:00.000-07:00

August deserves a B-. September, now September, deserves an A+. I always think it's hard to remain consistent and starting off strong isn't the point. The point is to keep a steady pace. I have to remember that life (uhhh) is a marathon, not a quick sprint for the finish.

I give September an A+ because today, unlike any other day so far this summer, I went grocery shopping. This time, I wasn't waiting in the car reading Me Talk Pretty One Day while my mom explored Valley Supermarket. Yeah, I started the book when Betty was still interning with me months ago. It's not boring at all. Don't blame the book. Blame me - I have a short attention span.

My choice of shopping is very limited in Asia Central. Trader Joe's is my go to market, but the nearby one is about a few miles too many for me to drive on an empty stomach. With a name like "Cali Mart" I presumed they'll sell asparagus and 2% milk. Lucky for me, I only had to shop at one market to gather all my ingredients! Side note: when I think of the word "gather" I always think of hunters and gatherers. Meh.

So let's look at this. Going to the supermaket deserves an A. Not an A+. The added + goes to me cooking!

Here it is, my first home-made dinner! I would have taken more photos of the process, but there was only one cook/photographer (me!) in the kitchen.

Chicken breast with lime juice, cilantro, chopped onions, salt, pepper. I would tell you the measurements if I knew them. Just eyeballed everything. I hate salty food, so I make sure I don't put too much salt. If it's too bland, I'll add it after. I
also created some indentations on the chicken because I think I'm such a chef.

The asparagus wasn't as fresh. I guess Asians prefer other tender greens like bok choy or green beans over asparagus.
I ended up cutting the edges off.

I usually bake my asparagus, but I had to work with what I had! Before stir frying it in a pan, I added some water and placed a lid over it so it'll be softer.

I boiled red potatoes (with skin) and garlic in salted water. After draining, I slowly added warm milk, cubes of butter, salt, and fresh chopped green onions. Mash away!

Look at them breasts!

Because them breasts were so big, I had to cut them up to make sure they were cooked all the way through! And good thing I did because the center was still raw. You can't always judge a chicken by it's outer golden skin.

Bon Appétit!

How Are You?

2011-09-01T15:18:00.000-07:00

When I ask someone "How are you?" I genuinely care about how they are. I want to hear details about their mental, emotional, physical, any other -al states. The proper response would be "I'm good" or "Fine." I'll then ask you to elaborate. "Fine" is relative.

Now, when others ask me how I am doing, they aren't really asking about my well-being. It just happens to roll off their tongue once they run into you. Here's an example of that scene.

FADE IN:

INT. OFFICE - DAY

MAN comes out of the kitchen. WOMAN walks into the kitchen.

MAN

Hey there. How are you?

WOMAN

Hello! I'm fine. I just--

MAN leaves the kitchen.

FADE OUT

This happened a lot to me when I worked at the library. I'd come into work at 7am, punch in, and my boss greets me with a nice "Good morning. How are you?" At first, I was so happy that she cared about me! I would answer with gusto! Eventually, I realized it was part of the greeting method. She's used to saying it all the time that it loses meaning. I tested this one time. Instead of answering her question, I changed the subject, commenting on the weather instead. If she was interested, she would have reiterated the question! And I stand corrected. She didn't say "It is hot today. How are you doing" but rather ended after her weather commentary.

Is this an American thing?

Please only ask questions you really want answers to.

And since today is the first day of September, why not celebrate with a song? The only ones I could think of were emo rock songs (i.e. Green Day- Wake Me Up When September Ends, Plain White T's- A Lonely September). Here's a good one to get you groovin' into September:

Earth, Wind, Fire- September

"How am I? I'm in love and I'm pregnant."

Things I learned today from the Kevin & Bean Show

2011-08-25T15:22:00.001-07:00

Brenda Song (23) is pregnant! The baby daddy is Trace Cyrus (guy who was in the band Metro Station with the song Shake It which kept playing constantly at the Teens Choice Awards when Miley was hosting). Whew, yeah and he's Miley's step brother. Or brother? Well, they're related. And Brenda Song is half Hmong and Thai. She no Korean.

I swear there was more valuable news that I learned today...

I'm a Recent Grad, I don't Need Money

2011-08-23T13:28:00.000-07:00

Great message, horrible lyrics. But sometimes, that's what you need to get the point across. It makes for a really good sing-along when I'm applying for internships. I really do look to my left and my right while I edit my cover letters.

And I'll just turn it off when my parents walk by.

Jessie J- Price Tag (anyone else think of Fergie?)

It's not about the money money money
We don't need your money money money
We just wanna make the world dance
Forget about the price tag
Ain't about the uh cha-ching cha-ching
Ain't about the yeah b-bling b-bling
Wanna make the world dance
Forget about the price tag

All By MyYelp

2011-08-23T11:14:00.000-07:00

He texted me this while he was in New Mexico. Please, don't get too excited. It read: "The further you go the fatter ppl get." I thought this was hilarious! I have never left the West Coast and I live in an area where people are constantly dieting, so the fact that 1 in 3 Americans are obese doesn't really resonant with me. I should get to the point of this entry. I'm not saying I want to be part of that American trend. I could always try, but trust me, I will fail. It's just not in my genes. I ain't complainin.

I don't want to be that girl who has to be with her boyfriend 24/7. I don't want to be so dependent on a single person. It's extremely unhealthy. What will happen to you if this person is no longer in your life? This is a challenge that I'm still going through today, and I have to say I've improved tremendously in the past four years. Jeez, I make this sound like I'm fighting some drug addiction.

From listening to Dr. Drew on Loveline to reading those eye-opening Yahoo! relationship articles, (they're really great at forcing me to take the jump, with headlines like Why some conflict is good, which reminds me, I should dedicate an entry toward these guilty pleasure articles on Yahoo!) the way we are, how we interact, the relationships we have, can be partially, if not completely, due to our childhood. So, yeah, my camp name really works well with this. Bambi aka Mommy Issues (thanks Kermit and Dino) should be reflected upon. I know my weaknesses, and I am aware of why I act the way I do. What I lack in certain areas, I make up in others. For some reason, Ralph Emerson's "Self-Reliance" comes to mind, even though I only read an excerpt from it as an assignment for my AP English class.

Moving on.

In my relationships resume, (someone please make a yelp for people and call it All By MyYelp) I can now add "Long Distance. " I know it's only been a few days, so it is hard to judge how this will go. We're both in the transitioning phase of our lives. We're young and eager with so many things we want to accomplish. That should keep us busy.

My First Second/Third shooter Wedding

2011-08-21T00:02:00.000-07:00

My left arm is aching. It's like that feeling after receiving a shot from the nurse. I just want to break it off. Thank's Henry for letting me shoot with you and Jonathan. I learned a lot, and I learned that I need to work out my arms more. I'll post up photos soon, but I'm embarrassed. They were not spectacular in my opinion! But hooray for finally experiencing the role of a second shooter! I've got a ton to learn!

Take Me With You

2011-08-20T23:35:00.000-07:00

Francis' attempt at taking a photo in dim lighting. I really like how it turned out though.

I did a paper/drawing in Mrs. O' Connor's class in 3rd grade. I love seahorses!

Reminds me a lot of our universe.

This reminds me of the line "I've seen more spine in jelly fish" by Brand New.

It makes me hold my breath.

I want this somewhere in my new house. It's a huge white ball projector. Ohh, ahh.

Same ball, informing us to save the sea.

Alien like.

I love jelly fish.

Makes me feel like I should keep pushing on.

A sea of sardines? It was extremely hard focusing through a thick glass, but I like this better.

Let me tell you a joke.

A good photo of a not so photogenic person!

Talk to the tail.

What a colorful world.

That shell thing reminds me of a sun hat!

Dragon seahorses.

Banh Xeo XXL

The last time we came to the Long Beach Aquarium, the place was already closed. The last time was exactly last summer and we have changed so much since then. Because I'm becoming really irrirated with writing full paragraphs, I'll list some highlights of the day. Of course, you will probably not understand anything I say, because most of it only makes sense to me! He's leaving tomorrow, yikes!

A day I'll never forget :)

Wrong route to Queen Mary
Pre-paid online did not save him money
Polaroid showed us in a cave
The sharks looked dead
Exit liar
Banana + chocolate + marshmellows + roasted almonds, or so I think
Right, right, and right
Snoop Dogg's hood
The Industrial City
Biggest Banh Xeo
Half/Half
Restroom break in identical house
Psuedo first world problems
The Notebook Night

Shoes, Shoes, Shoes

2011-08-18T14:09:00.000-07:00

Such a busy week! And sadly, lately, I've been looking at fashion blogs, and window shopping online. This is the collection of shoes that I've obtained in the past... day. It doesn't hurt to have a wish list! Oh, and I wear a size 5. Oh hey!

Just Ask Yourself

2011-08-12T11:58:00.000-07:00

It's a strange mood. I think listening to Death Cab's Two Brothers On a Hotel Bed is not helping my mood. Maybe it's also the emptiness of this room. I'm thinking about the future. Please forgive me if I go off on tangents and begin babbling like a five year old. It'll be my first (of many?) rants.I should be content right now; recent grad with a job. When I say job, I mean I get paid. It's actually an "internship" but it feels like a job. And I love it here. A lot. There is potential for being a real employee. While others would be ecstatic about such an opportuniy, I'm not. The practical (hah), cautious me would intern here for as long as possible until it becomes a full time job. But for some reason (I'm blaming all the brainwashing from inspirational speakers) I can't go on and do that.

As a kid, I've heard from so many speakers/adults/teachers/mentors to always follow your passion. They say "Do what you love." You know you love your job if you answer yes to this: If they didn't pay you, would you still work there?

And from a realistic standpoint, the job economy is so bad nowadays, that having any job is good enough. Others have told me that I should find a job, work on my hobbies on the side, and when I make enough money, quit, and pursue that hobby. This really makes sense and it is the smartest route. That's also the easiest route.

I see a long road ahead of me. I see many stories of attempts and failures. I hope to one day look back and be able to tell a story of triumph.

Here's inspiration for you all:
The point is, I can’t tell you how to succeed. But I can tell you how not to: Give in to the shame of being rejected and put your manuscript—or painting, song, voice, dance moves, [insert passion here]—in the coffin that is your bedside drawer and close it for good. I guarantee you that it won’t take you anywhere. Or you could do what this writer did: Give in to your obsession instead.

And if your friends make fun of you for chasing your dream, remember—just lie.

Let's Talk Toilet Seat Covers

2011-08-09T15:55:00.000-07:00

Public restrooms are fine with me, but I fear for others. I fear for others who will share the restroom with me, at my time of NEED. But lucky for one of my co workers, she walked in at a good time. I was just changing.

And then a thought occurred to me. Once my butt cheeks kissed the toilet seat, the restroom door opened, then I heard foot steps, then the stall door opened next to me, then the sound of crumbling paper. Ahh, the toilet seat cover. I realized that I have not done that. It isn't intuitive for me to do so. Am I being a nasty girl? I sometimes don't wash my apples before I eat them. When cupcake crumbles fall on the table, I lick my index finger and dab the delicious pieces up and into my mouth. Heck, I can say that I don't shower daily (8 days was my limit, oh the Woodsey challenge). When I simply must go, I go. I'm not patient enough to find the thin opening and pull it away. It's almost like getting that one thin slice of rice paper from a family of rice papers for my Korean BBQ. I end up picking two pieces and they rip, making them useless for my wrap. The topic of food and lavatory always seem to go hand in hand during a conversation. Anyways, after taking the toilet seat covers out, you then have to place them on the toilet seat, which I think needs to be done strategically. It has to be centered so it won't fall into the toilet. It's really disgusting. I'm imagining the minutiae of these private moments between you and your bowel movements in my head, and I feel awful for the toilet seat cover. Not only do they have to deal with our butts on their faces, they're the first to come in contact with the cumulation of your poor food intake. They begin their life neatly tucked in the container with their other look alike friends. When they are chosen, they feel joyous, free, for a second until they're forced to cohabit with a thermoplastic friend who doesn't like to travel. Once they become acquianted, a third party comes in, forcing a quick (hopefully) ménage à trois of sorts. And how are they thanked? They're flushed down the toilet with the rest of them. The end.

Note though, I do use toilet seat covers, sparingly, when the restroom is disgusting. But if you're in a clean public restroom, like your work restroom, think about that. Think about the life of the toilet seat cover. Is it worth it?

I really like this song

2011-08-08T17:54:00.000-07:00

July 2011 Huntington Beach, CA

Click here. Press play.

If you're genuinely smiling, shaking your body back and forth, and singing/reading along (in your head counts too), then you're fucking in love (at this moment). Or maybe you just really like this song.

Commentary on DCFC's Tourist just for you

2011-08-08T15:31:00.000-07:00

On our drive back from Westwood, I took the initiative to over annoy my driver. I heard it before, but it didn't stick with me. But that was a few months ago when I was a few months younger. Now Death Cab's You Are A Tourist will be on repeat a lot this month. Some old fans might hate this because it's just too... positive! My comments will be in parenthesis, and when I say comments, I mean stupid, strange words that will make you raise your eyebrow. Imagine a lot of gusto! And raised arms! And random sounds in between as I try to explain this song to you.

When there's a burning in your heart
An endless yearning in your heart (YES!)
Build it bigger than the sun (the sun is so big, wow go for it!)
Let it grow, let it grow (grow as big as the sun, if you can!)
When there's a burning in your heart
Don't be alarmed (don't be scared, yes you can have aspirations and desires!)

This fire grows higher (YES IT DOES!)

When there's a doubt within your mind (don't doubt, how dare you!)
Because you're thinking all the time (remember, thinking is only intended for do or die exams)
Framing rights into wrongs (no, the cup is half full, bro)
Move along, move along (American rejects)
When there's a doubt within your mind (negative pops up, crush it, erase it, don't give it attention!)

When there's a burning in your heart (again)
And you think it'll burst apart (it's too good to be true, don't let me jinx it)
Or there's nothing to feel
Save the tears, save the tears (stop being such a negative nancy)
When there's a burning in your heart

And if you feel just like a tourist in the city you were born
Then it's time to go (fuck, this is my favorite line, hi hi )
And define your destination
There's so many different places to call home (there is, got me thinking, gone gone)
Because when you find yourself the villain in the story you have written
It's plain to see (you are the sole controller of your story, write a great one, be a hero)
That sometimes the best intentions are in need of redemptions
Would you agree?
If so please show me (okay, i don't really care much about this part)

This fire grows higher
When there's a burning in your heart (fire! grows! higherr!)

Rice and water and words

2011-08-08T14:50:00.000-07:00

September 4, 2011 Seoul, Korea

Being minus one here means I'm in this room alone. The people on my screen are fascinating; it's a side I never get to see. Millions are sharing without knowing. I know so much about you, yet I've never even met you. I don't think people could have said this a few years ago. I know so much about you - your thoughts, your interests, your philosophies on life, your ways - without ever having a face to face conversation with you. You take what you can, and others will take the rest.

I wouldn't feed this rice to you if you begged me.

Create something, and add value to your days. It's been too long, sitting here, watching others sparkle, sparkle while I dust away.

Re-locate?

Chaptalize: to increase the alcohol in a wine by adding sugar.

WOW!

85 1.4

2011-08-07T18:28:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Amazon, the package came in a day for a flat fee of 3.99. I couldn't help but take some test shots in the Le residency.

Mon, Tues, Wed, Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun

2011-08-05T15:42:00.000-07:00

When Friday comes around, I always want to play a song to celebrate. But resorting to Rebecca Black's Friday (i couldn't find the original video, way too many parodies and remakes) ends up ruining my Friday. I tried thinking of other songs with this Friday theme on my own, without the help of google. Katy Perry's Last Friday Night obviously was the second contender. But that isn't fair because her and Black are homies (watch her video, she makes an important cameo). I started thinking... I get paid on Fridays! That idea led me to my second favorite boy bands of the late 90's: Nsync! Their song Just Got Paid sprinkles in Friday (Just got paid, Friday night, Party hoppin', feelin right). But no, not good enough.

Then, lo and beyond, it came to me! THE CURE! Friday, I'm In Love. How could I have not thought of that!? I decided to take a look at the lyrics, and oh my lanta, it's brilliant. It does what Rebecca couldn't do: brilliantly educated me in the days of the week. Take a look:

Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday
Today i-is Friday, Friday (Partyin')
We-we-we so excited
We so excited
We gonna have a ball today

Tomorrow is Saturday
And Sunday comes after... wardsI don't want this weekend to end

I really had to google the lyrics. Amazing stuff. But, how dare she leave out Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday? These days are necessary for Thursday to happen, which leads to Friday, then leads to the weekend! Really now. How dare they leave out the middle children. But now take a look at this:

I don't care if Monday's blue
Tuesday's gray and Wednesday too
Thursday I don't care about you
It's Friday, I'm in love

Monday you can fall apart
Tuesday, Wednesday break my heart
Oh, Thursday doesn't even start
It's Friday I'm in love

Saturday, wait
And Sunday always comes too late
But Friday, never hesitate...

I don't care if Mondays black
Tuesday, Wednesday - heart attack
Thursday, never looking back
It's Friday, I'm in love

Monday, you can hold your head
Tuesday, Wednesday stay in bed
Or Thursday - watch the walls instead
It's Friday, I'm in love

Saturday, wait
And Sunday always comes too late
But Friday, never hesitate...

Repetition is key, my friends. Every line has a day in it. Every day is equally represented! This is pure music genius. I feel the love for every day of the week here, and they are in order! Now this is what I'd let my kids listen to if they sadly can never ingrain the days in their heads. This will make it easier.

So what did you get away from this? That Hong needs a life.

And here's to you, Mrs. Betty Ho

2011-08-04T21:42:00.000-07:00

Betty, this is for you. I was going to type a crap load of crap here, but I realized the photos will speak for themselves. You already know you're the shiz, so I won't state the obvious. Thank you for being a fab fab co worker, model, friend, and seriously biggest fan of my photography. Thank you for inspiring me in so many ways. And please update your blog (you guys should check it out, she's a terrific writer), even at your new job! I hope you enjoy them, sweetie pooh!

Next time, you will be wearing THE SHOE

Thank you for doing ridiculous things for you!

This car really inspired you!

Who would ever do this!?

Yup, she's in the trunk of her own car.

The first posed photograph.

SWAG

Money is not interested in women!

Oh hello my little friend (say this in a creepy voice).

She's always so calm and collected.

Wrist watch me.

All natural, baby!

I'm trying to be normal (go Betty!)

Recognize that?

It's Betty's eye, I swear!

And here's music for you all: Simon & Garfunkel - Mrs. Robinson

Can't put a price on that

2011-08-04T15:45:00.000-07:00

Ever since my friend asked me how much I charge for photoshoots, I've been scavenging the internet for some tips. I have an idea of what I believe, but it was nice to open up my mind and read what others had to say. An aspiring photographer started a thread that really fit my current state: how much do I charge?

One person responded with: $300. Don't undervalue yourself.

I couldn't help but laugh at that. $300 sounds expensive, doesn't it? I don't feel like I have that much credibility and experience to charge someone $300 dollars, especially for my first shoot. I do think it's a great price once you've shot more than 5-10 photoshoots because not only have you improved, but you also begin to truly believe and value whole-heartedly in your work. You know that you can deliver.

"Never ever shoot for free. Not only are you screwing yourself, but the entire photographic industry. Why? Shooting for free tells people photography has no value," another person replied back. Abrasive, but I agreed with this. If you're going to shoot for free (with the idea that someone asked you to shoot them, not you offering) it really undervalues what you do, and people won't take it seriously.

Lastly, I think this person answered it best: "Don't undervalue yourself when your starting out. I've been there too and also felt that I didn't want to charge until I was sure that I could deliver the best. $25 is not enough though, remember you need to charge for your time spent shooting the session, time spent editing the session, all the admin side of things and also your talent. Photography is an art after all and your clients are buying your work. Undervaluing that will only set you up for a fall at the start. Think carefully about how long you spend on each client session and work out from there what you think is best for your current situation."

I have confidence that I will take the best photographs for you. I will do whatever I can to deliver the best results. I've committed so much energy and time into photography, teaching myself for the past three years. I've always enjoyed it, but I never took it seriously. I never took myself seriously. If you know me, you know I'm not serious (unless the occasion calls for it.) That's what I lacked: self-confidence. Photography is the only thing I feel confident about. It's the only thing I'm extremely passionate about (I know this because when I have free time I'm constantly reading photography forums, looking at wedding/engagement shoots, looking for poses, lighting, inspiration, anything photography related until my mother calls me to go eat.) I have no idea where I'm going with this. Oh yes, pricing.

So how does one determine pricing? I value my photography, but I know I'm lacking the credentials/the experience/the proof. However, it's similar to applying for an internship or a job. We've all been there, where we have no experience in the job related field. However, we make up for it in different ways. I'm not going to charge an extensive amount because I am not that great. Doing that will really be cheating my potential clients. However, I don't want to charge so less because I really value what I do and I want to be taken seriously. I do want experience from these photoshoots, so that is already a reward in itself. The pricing really comes in for the time I commit after I take the photographs. I also have to think how many people will be in the shoot, how many outfit changes they want, how many locations, how far the locations will be, if they want printed photographs or images on a cd. There are many factors included.

So to conclude this much lengthy self discussion, I want clients who want me because of my photographs, not the price.

And to answer the question I stated in the beginning of the entry, "I'll get back to you on that."

Marilyn and George Part I

2011-08-03T15:13:00.000-07:00

Here's my first "couples" photoshoot. Usually, the more formal name would be an "e-session" e standing for engagement. Obviously, my friends are only 22 years old, so they aren't getting married soon. But if you are, let me know!

Marilyn blames George for coming late, but it's my fault. As the photographer, I should have been more decisive in where to go. It was a race between us and the sun. Here are some lessons I learned at my first shoot:

- photos on your lcd screen is not a good representation of the real thing
- take as many photos as you can
- if it's already 7pm, you gotta get to your main destination before the sun's down (ours was newport beach)
- pre-visualize
- give more concrete instructions with examples
- don't be afraid of taking a photograph that you normally would not take
- find the light, play around with it, don't stick to one angle
- take advantage of the time you do have with the sun!

Again, thank you so much Marilyn and George! You guys were more than fab fab. Look at the title! It means there will be a part two!

Marilyn Mini Shoot

2011-08-03T09:09:00.000-07:00

Thank you Marilyn for being such a great model. I know I was horrible! "Uh, Marilyn can you stand up there? Wait, nevermind. Let's go there. Yeah, stand on that rock!" But I have to say, they didn't turn out that bad! This was my first "shoot" and when I mean "shoot" I mean, I planned it with her, and it was not an "event" thing. A majority of my photographs are more photojournalist; I observe and shoot. Here, I had control.

Oh! And this was shot with a 35mm 1.4L, yeah I put L! No, it wasn't mine. I rented it to see if I'd ever want to buy it when I become filthy rich.

Below, I'll caption each image with some things I said during the shoot.

"You're doing great, Marilyn!"

"Where are you looking? Stay there, it looks good though!" side now: that black dot next to her head really bugs me. need to take that out!

"Can you step up on this and walk towards me? Don't fall!"

"Step away from the playground. Crap there's a shadow on your face. Can you move to the right?"

"Where's George!?"

"You look naked."

HAHAHA with no reply

2011-08-02T10:58:00.000-07:00

I think I'm so clever with my jokes. But I'm not. Not at all!

Case in point...

friend: mm. hows work

me: you know. im listening to music on youtube. eating my moms dumplings

friend: oo. lunch time already? lololol

me: it's not lunch time. am i not allowed to eat? my laptop is all greasy. HAHAH

No response. No "haha" back. End of conversation. At least I get the last laugh?

Munch On Me: Incredible Sandbag's

2011-08-01T14:35:00.000-07:00

Click here for More Munch on Me Deals

What more can I say? I'm definitely driving all the way to Westwood to get this sandwich. I love Sandbag's. I'll create another post later this week with an original photo of this sandwich. I promise you!

Lessons From My Mother/Small White Lies I Tell My Mother Daily

2011-08-01T14:22:00.000-07:00

I proposed the idea of writing about shit my parents say but apparently there's a show called Shit My Dad Says. Does this mean I am unoriginal? Balls. Below are some things my mother tells me. She tells me a lot of things, repeatedly, everyday and this is all my mind can do for now.

Lessons From My Mother/Small White Lies I Tell My Mother Daily

Always Drink Water Because I live in a small apartment, my parents and I are very close. I eat in front of them, I use the computer in front of them, and I read books in front of them. For some reason, I feel like this could become a naughty post. Anyway, after every meal, my mother approaches me with a tall glass of warm tea. I lie to her saying I already drank water. She looks at me and puts the cup on the table. "Always drink water. You have to drink at least three of these cups a day so you can pee regularly. How many do you drink a day? It's good for you," she says as she walks away towards the kitchen." It's good for your skin and your body. You don't want pimples."

Sleep early if you have to wake up early/8 Hours of Sleep I'm always reminded of this when I wake up at 2pm. Or when I'm up on my computer editing photographs until 4am and she wakes up. Then the next morning I wake up at 6am for work. That's when she begins to talk to herself, but loud enough so I can hear. Some days I might only get 6 hours of sleep, but when asked how many hours, I reply "8" and the conversation ends happily.

Always eat rice If you come over, there will ALWAYS be rice in the rice cooker. Even if we are eating something outrageous like Pho that day, there will be rice. It's like that movie, There Will Be Blood. Just replace that with Rice.

Never owe people money "Yeah, I have to go to my friend's house to give him back his 20 dollars." My mom gets crazy and she rushes me out the door so I can get to my friend's house faster. She hates being in debt. She hates having to rely on others for money. She'd rather borrow/ask money from her than from people outside the family.

Don't eat fatty foods I brought home a box of chicken wings. She looked at them and proclaimed "Oh I hope you took off the skin before you ate the chicken. It's very fattening, you know." I'm trying to imagine myself tearing off the skin of a juicy hot wing. The waiter's going to be left with chicken skins and bones. She makes it a point to decrease as much fat as possible. She'll cut off any excess fat on steaks, pork, chicken, fish. If you ever want extremely healthy YET the most delicious Bun Bo Hue ever, come over! She does this technique where she puts the home made beef stock in the fridge so all the fat floats on top, which she discards.

Don't wear heels that are above an inch As I left for work this morning in my two inch high boots, she looked at me with caution. As I made my way down the stairs, she yelled from fifty feet away, "Be careful! Walk slower!" She's heard horror stories, actually just one story, about her co worker's friend's neighbor who broke her ankle from walking down the stairs in high heels. If it can happen to her co worker's friend's neighbor, it can happen to me.

Boys suck

2011-08-01T13:30:00.000-07:00

I found these photos (taken Feb 2010 I believe) from my Canon Rebel XS/2010 file. I miss that little guy.

Oh my gosh, I just found out there's a "add caption" option under my photos. This fits perfectly with my theme!

Food Lovers unite! Get ready for Munch On Me!

2011-07-29T09:03:00.000-07:00

I should have posted about Munch On Me on Monday, but I did a lot of advertising via email, tumblr, facebook, and direct marketing and wanted to spread it throughout the week. And we all love to put things off until the very last minute. It seems hundreds of people have claimed their deals (Yay!) but now they need to actually go to the restaurants! It ends in two days! It's Friday, so go out and socialize, be merry, be jolly, be full. Eat!

You can see the deals to your left!

So how does this relate to "Images + Captions" theme (I'm trying)? I'm part of the West LA team as a photographer/writer. Once everything is finalized, I go in, interview about the restaurant/dish, photograph it, munch on it, and do a write up. There is currently another photographer, and she is fabulous!

LATimes wrote a great article on their blog under the Technology section. You can read more about it here. Here's a snippet of it.

Munch On Me offers specific food items -- just individual items, not entire meals -- for a week, at discounts that vary by restaurant. Usually, each week, three or four items are up for grabs and as soon as users buy an item, they can redeem their discount.

Jason Wang, the CEO, has a long term goal for Munch On Me.

"Our market is really the whole world, because everybody eats," he said. "We're just getting started, but we want to be the go-to service when you ask yourself everyday 'what am I going to eat today.' People turn to Facebook for social networking, LinkedIn for professional networking, Amazon to buy things, Craigslist to sell things -- we want to be that for food."

And a question everyone asks is, "So it's like Groupon, but mainly for food?" We are very different from Groupon. Instead of offering a blanket discount on all products (such as 10 dollars for 20 dollars worth of food on the menu) we focus only on food/a single dish, and it is usually a dish the restaurant owners want to feature. Think of Groupon as a one time thing. People who are on here are bargain hunters, searching for the best deals. They are not going to go back to the restaurant and pay full price for it when the deal ends. Munch On Me, however, differs in that the users are avid foodies and yelpers, looking for the best food at the best value. Munch On Me does the work for you, and gives you great deals on dishes you will love.

I hope that was somewhat informative! Munch On Me is not only in LA! If you read the article I mentioned above (Do it!) Munch On Me is available in following locations:

California
Berkeley / East Bay
Orange County
San Francisco
San Jose / South BayWest Los Angeles

And will be ready to launch in these locations in the near future!
California
San Diego
Illinois
Chicago
New York
New York City
Washington
Seattle

So let's go and make Munch On Me a verb! You know, like...

Friend: I'm hungry. What should we eat?
Genius Friend: Let's Munch it.

I tried! But honestly, go to Munch On It, now, tomorrow, every day, and you'll never have to go hungry again (or resort to Micky D's).

Going GAGA at Jimmy Kimmel Live!?

2011-07-28T12:41:00.000-07:00

Tet Festival in Little Saigon: 2010

Heyo! Quick update before I head out to lunch. 1iota emailed me yesterday:

Hey Guys,

We are very excited about tomorrow's show with James Franco and Lady Gaga! Our line / check-in will begin at 4 PM SHARP. We will finish check-in and be moving the audience into the studio at 4:30PM SHARP. Come early and be prepared for a fun show!

I had to re-read that. LADY GAGA!?

Every post should have a photo. And it has NO correlation with this blog whatsoever.

Music for you:
Lady Gaga- Edge of Glory (live acoustic)

Shut up and get going!

2011-07-27T11:11:00.000-07:00

Namsan Tower, Seoul, Korea 2010

Wednesday, you are cruel. It's ONLY 11:03. This will be a quick blurb. I'm not going to think about what I am writing, rather, I will be writing anything to pass the time.

My co-wo made a folder on her laptop titled "Future Wedding Ideas" or something familiar to that. Like always, I'm browsing Wedding photographer's site to seek inspiration. Most of the time, it makes me feel "sucky" and annoyed, envious, and also joyful of their success. I told my co-wo and she was surprised also, at my conclusions of the characteristics of photographers I've stalked so far: 20s to 30s, believer in God, married/engaged. Yay, two more to go for me!

Last week was such a high for me. It was full of potential! And that fire is slowly dwindling away.

For Everything

2011-07-25T14:09:00.000-07:00

Thank you.

Art in the Streets (Little Tokyo)

2011-07-24T01:07:00.000-07:00

Hello, Le Residence.

2011-07-22T14:25:00.000-07:00

Maybe one day, I'll write about my parents, my brother. For now, I'll enjoy the time I have with them.

Here's a song for you:
Death Cab For Cutie- Brothers On A Hotel Bed

Have a fanciful Friday!

Vietnam Airlines Would Have Been Easier

2011-07-21T14:18:00.000-07:00

"This is Air China, not China Airlines. You'll have to go out, and turn right. It's in the Tom Bradley Building," she said as she handed me my father's passport and flight information. I grabbed them and started walking briskly towards the sliding glass doors, with my father following closely behind.

"It's wrong. You should have checked," he said to me. For some reason, I assumed it was Air China because that was the airline I took to Korea. Who knew? I had to admit, yes, I was wrong, and my father was right. Like always.

"China Airlines has China at the front. And this one has A-I-R then China after," laughed my mother. "If I was here alone I would never even make my flight." She's really good making light of serious situations. Now I know where I get my constant commentary skills from.

Before today, my father told me to be home 7:30pm so I can take him to the airport at 9pm, 5 hours before his departure. I didn't want to bother arguing, so I dropped my plans and was home at 7:30. I never understood showing up to something 5 hours early, unless I'm waiting in line to get great seats at a show. His reasoning, like many, is because "in case something goes wrong." He's always extremely prepared, but that takes a toll on his mental health. My dad is constantly stressed, over the littlest details.

For example, as we were leaving our apartment, I handed him a pack of floss. I wasn't sure if floss existed in Vietnam so I gave it to him in case. If I had to choose between flossing or brushing, I'd pick flossing. It's liberating to know that the gaps between my teeth are vacant, and that I don't have last night's dinner in my mouth as I'm eating breakfast. He placed it in his duffle bag. After honestly a few minutes of staring at his bag, he took out the floss. He held onto it, looking at his luggage, then at his duffle bag, then back at the floss in his hand.

"Dad, it's fine to leave it in the carry on. As long as you don't have any liquids, or drugs, or weapons," I reassured him. My brother jokingly told me later when I told him this story that floss can be used as a weapon. I can imagine that. It's similar to how Middle Eastern women thread their eyebrows, but instead they can slice off appendages with a quick wrist motion.

My father didn't say anything and placed the floss in his luggage. He couldn't risk it.

As we were in the now China Airlines check-in line, he gave me 10 dollars to pay for the parking. I refused, confidently telling him that parking will not be that much, six dollars maximum. He took out the money from his leather fanny pack and gave it to the my brother instead.

The line was packed, and we moved every five minutes. As I looked around, I couldn't help but wish I was going with him. It's been 7 months since my trip abroad, and I'm still living in the memories.

A majority of the passengers were Vietnamese - I can tell by the numerous Nguyens labelled on their cardboard boxes. My dad had a similar one too, except his was protected with layers of tape, just in case. A few feet away from us stood a Vietnamese couple, the kind that made me resent my own people (at least in my generation). She had long, coarse, black hair with red highlights. It's as if she dyed it 1000 times and had it permed, then straightened, then permed again. I know I shouldn't judge, but I had nothing better to do in that line. She stood at 5 feet, maybe even less since she had on heels. Her waist looked like a 24, and I could bet that her twins were bought. They were round, and large, making her body disproportionate. I looked down at mine, and knew for a fact hers were fake. Sorry little babies, but you are staying the way you are. Her man was beside her, rearranging items in the luggage. He looked like a nice guy. Slender, around 5 inches taller than his companion. His hair though, turned me off. It was the typical Asian cut. I wish I knew hair terms, but it was buzzed on the bottom (a fade?) and there was hair on top. Sorry, but you probably know what I mean. If not, google "typical Asian hair cut for men." (I lied, I just googled it. Maybe styles have changed).

The breast augmented lady glanced over, and I felt her eyes looking at me. She's probably thinking I'm some 15 year old nerdy tourist who needs a makeover: more makeup, more hair, more junk in the trunk, more oomph. I gave her a kind smile, and she looked away.

The line began to move and finally, we were next. The check-in agent handed my father the golden ticket, the one he's been waiting for for the past 17 years.

"We can't go with you to security," I told my dad. "This is it!"

He gave me a kiss, more like a sniff, on the cheek. He then went to my brother and did the same. We are not an intimate bunch, until I went off the college.

"You should take a photo of that!" said my brother. I looked over, and holy moly, my dad just gave my mom a kiss on the cheek. We've never witnessed this before! Yes, we saw them holding hands when my dad made me record them at the park for his home made music video. And we've seen them dance when my dad showed me some ballroom moves before dropping me off at my eighth grade dance. But never have I seen my dad's lips pressed against my mom's beautiful blushed cheeks. Never! I smiled, not just because of the rarity of the event, but at the fact that it was so low-key, so normal. I can't imagine being with someone for 38 years. Go parents!

The walk back to the car felt quiet without the presence of my dad. We got lost looking for our car and the situation was rather funny. We joked around, pretending to be my dad, thinking of what he would be saying right now. Usually, if my dad would start yelling at us for being so forgetful. He would stress, and stress, and stress, and won't stop until we found the car.

Three and a half hours later, we were finally heading back. I handed the man at the booth our parking ticket. "That will be nine dollars," he told me. I looked at my brother without saying a word and he handed me the ten dollar bill.

The Future's Open Wide

2011-07-20T16:44:00.000-07:00

(Summer 2009)

Please, don't go! I know it's what you wanted, but don't leave me! I'm partially joking. You deserve it. From today's events, it seems like the job market is looking up. "Did I tell you I got promoted?" read a text message from my friend. Before this, I discovered that another friend also got hired. Things are really looking up, and it makes me extremely joyous, and at the same time, I wonder when it will be my turn. I can't complain though because I currently have an amazing paid internship (if I complain then I honestly am spoiled rotten.) But it makes me question if my dreams are feasible.

This Summer, the conclusion of my "career" rests in Photography. Wedding and portraiture photography. I know, Right? I must think I'm all that and a bag of Hot Cheetos, to be stating such aspirations. But in the long run, I don't see myself working in an office. I see myself interacting with people, capturing moments that will only happen once (unless they divorce, and marry again) and I see myself bringing smiles and joy to others. If one photo can bring that emotion for them, I am forever content. The odds are against me. I know how competitive that industry is. I know it won't happen over night. But I do know that if I keep practicing, discover my visual style, avoid the naysayers and follow my gut, then I'll be steps closer to my goal. So, when friends tell me they got the job they applied for, it shouldn't make me feel like I'm behind, like I'm doing something wrong with my life. For me, it'll just take a little more extra licks to reach the center of a Tootsie lollipop. I'm going to bang my head against the wall for that horrible analogy. In all seriousness, I need to let go of my fear of inadequacy and my fear of failure and be as cliche as possible: TAKE A RISK.

Here's a song for you:
Nouvelle Vague- I Melt With You

Hope you're having a wild Wednesday!

Yes, I take photos of cats because they are my friends

2011-07-19T12:09:00.000-07:00

I've always been against taking photographs of dogs/cats/snakes/pets, until the tables turned. Until I realized these little darlings are like my human friends, but more generous about having their photo taken. They do as humans do: poop, eat, sneeze, cuddle, meow. But they don't shy away from the camera. When they do, I have the luxury of picking them up and positioning them. If only I was strong enough and my human friends kind enough to let me pick them up and place them in the best light. As I was saying, my (brother's) cat poses and yet can still look natural. When you put them in front of the camera, they don't give you that stink eye- take it now so i can delete it for you - look. They look at the camera, shake it off, and continue napping, and in this case, on the suitcase in the corner of our hallway.

To Like or Not To Like, Why?

2011-07-18T15:13:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Facebook's "Like" application, my vocabulary has declined tremendously and my critical thinking skills are embarrassingly nonexistent. When I see a post, a photo, a comment, two things pop in my head: Do I like this? Yes, I do, so let's click "Like!" And I can't do that anymore. I need reasons, substantial reasons for why I like something. I'm seriously working on that. Expanding my brain to delve deeper. Yes, I like it. Now why?

This photograph was taken during my study abroad trip in Korea, which was also posted on my tumblr, my rather poorly managed blog. I had this original idea of creating a blog about my travels, as a way to keep my friends back home updated on my adventures and also to help those who might be following in my footsteps. Naturally, I kept active for the first week, but who has time to sit in front of a computer when one is in a foreign land! It's good to see that the blog was only used sparingly because I know that I spent my time in Korea actually basking in the Korean sunshine. There are no regrets.

Now, to the challenge. I like it because I like the isolation. I love the deer's elongated neck as it's dining on some fine grass (this just made me think of weed, wow). It creates this wholesome shape, contrasiting from the rest of the photo. I love the pattern of the spots on Bambi. I named the deer Bambi. Like I said, my right brain needs extra fine-tuning. I love the texture added with the grass. There's an untamed innocence. There's a peacefulness. The high angle isolating the deer at the same time makes me feel like Bambi will be safe, forever.